Parent Coaching, Child and Family Counseling, Lynn Tienken, Seattle, Kirkland, Washington

The Joy of Being a Therapist

My journey into the field of marriage and family counseling began with my own curiosity about creating "a healthy family environment" for my two sons. Growing up in a large family challenged by parent conflict, I knew that I wanted my children and spouse not to suffer from my childhood pains. As a elementary teacher and school counselor for 12 years, I was actively engaged in "creative problem solving" with my students' parents. However, I felt limited in dealing with children and parents in the educational setting by not being able to do the personal work with families that I now have the privilege of doing as a therapist and coach.

Every morning I look forward to the honor of working with my clients, helping them understand their present-day challenges and cope with their pain. In the last 27 years my time with individuals, children, and families continually humbles me as I witness their courage as they face their problems. Together we discover tools for their growth that fit their immediate needs. Couples find new avenues to reach each other and parents delight in new-found tools for communicating with their children. Magic happens in my office as conflicts are resolved and insights are revealed. For me this is the joy of being a marriage and family therapist..

Go to the people, Learn from them, Love them, Start with what they know, Build on what they have. But the best of leaders, When their task is accomplished And their work is done, The people will remark "We have done it ourselves."
-- Old Chinese Proverb

Often a new part of ourselves emerges when we focus our energies on a community project. Our current challenges become secondary to the immediate needs of those coping with survival.

Life changed for me in 2004 when I assumed the task of completing the building and supplying of a rural health center in La Guacamaya, Honduras. This village was devastated by Hurricane Mitch and rebuilt through the collaborative efforts of U.S. volunteers. An American optometrist along with his community initiated the construction of a village health center. My task was to complete the project. All those years as a family therapist did not prepare me for the task of supervising the installation of cement floors; hiring contractors to install ceilings and electricity; and sourcing medical equipment and supplies. This was definitely out of my comfort zone. With guidance from friends back home and with embracing support and direction from the villagers, a health clinic was completed ~ and I was transformed. I now know with certainty that when the desire to help is strong, talents emerge and people appear to help

As a result of my time in Central America, I became aware of opportunities for individuals and families in the United States to give of their time and talents to a village in Central America or to other community projects. Volunteers (adults, children, families) brought not only healthcare experience but also other life skills: teaching, home building, business expertise, and delight in playing with the village children. A willingness to experience working in a village with people who have an open heart is all that's needed.

This project in La Guacamaya has morphed into a larger vision through the efforts of a young medical student at the University of Washington. Through his nonprofit, Salud Juntos, he has inspired students and healthcare professionals to join in creating programs that entice healthcare professionals within Honduras to reach out to the needs of the rural poor. This type of outreach is teaching students that volunteerism and community building is a healer not only for the receiving community but also for the volunteers. This is another example of the power of giving --and reaching beyond ourselves.